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Why pornography is far from ‘victimless’ and how to quit using it


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HOW PORNOGRAPHY AFFECTS CHRISTIAN LIFE

TOM LAMPRECHT: Harry, I would like to take you to an interview today that Evangelical Focus did on pornography and sexual distortion. It was done with Glen Harrison. Dr. Harrison is a British psychiatrist and he’s also a Christian author. He says that pornography creates an illusion of control because it offers access to sexual stimulation so quickly and easily. He talks about the number of young people — I mean young, young people — who are now getting caught up in pornography and how it is distorting their whole view of sexuality.

DR. REEDER: This epidemic of pornography has produced not only distortion of God’s precious gift of sexuality, it has also produced anarchy. People will say that pornography is a “victimless crime.” Well, I would just have you go back to the month of December in 2017 when six of these porn stars took their lives in depression. There they were in their early 20s.

Also, look at what happens in marriages as, particularly, men are affected by this and what they then demand, and what they call for and how they begin to view their spouse. In the whole pornography industry, the person observed for stimulation then becomes objectified. They aren’t real people — they’re just something for one’s own pleasure. Then the objectivization of the spouse takes place after people get addicted to these activities.

Another dynamic is you’re a victim because these things that are viewed are then cemented into one’s life through the most powerful experience that is known to humanity, reaching far beyond cocaine and heroin.

And then, these things, they are actually designed to take you from sexual distortion to sexual depravity into sexual anarchy and the victimless crimes? Oh, no, not by any means. All you have to do is observe the #MeToo movement. Those who have made these assaults upon women, you will find a life of pornography.

You will also see something else that is documented and that is #ThemToo, referring to the fact that there is a significant number of those who are caught up in the addiction of pornography that then carry out their distortions of sexuality upon the mentally incapable, upon those who are disabled — disabled physically, disabled mentally and those who are dissipated toward the end of their life — and that story that is not covered by the media has proportions that are absolutely staggering.

No, this is not a victimless crime and this is not a matter of just personal pleasure that one does in the privacy of their life. And, of course, the greatest victims of all are those whose lives are destroyed to provide this “adult entertainment.” There is probably no term that is more inaccurate than to call pornography “adult entertainment.” There’s nothing adult about it.

TOM LAMPRECHT: Harry, we have literally thousands of individuals that listen to this podcast. No doubt, there are some believers that are caught up in pornography and they’re saying to themselves, “Pastor Reeder, I hear you. I can’t get out of it.” Harry, what would you say to that individual?

DR. REEDER: Oh, yes you can. Oh, yes you can. Believe me, I know you can. How do you do it? Well, first of all, name it for what it is: it’s sin. It is adultery in the heart and it is even worse than that because of its objectivization of the other gender.

HOW TO REPENT FOR THE SIN

Name it and ask God to forgive you from it. He will. He can remove the shame and the guilt and erase it away and Jesus died to pay for that sin.

Then, secondly, ask God for the grace to turn from that sin. Don’t try to go into the, “Well, I’m just going to kind of wean myself off of it.” Oh, no, no. Just pluck out right eyes and cut off right hands. We’re ready to walk away from this. We are absolutely ready to do it and the Bible tells us that, the addictions of life, God can set us free from.

Then you believe to build in your life a new way of life. Get rid of your secret life — everyone in pornography has a secret life of places they go, computers they visit, sites they go to. Get rid of all of that.

ACCOUNTABILITY MATTERS

Next, get accountability in your life, starting with your spouse if you’re married. Get accountability. If you’re not married, get your parents involved or get some close friends involved in your life. Take the steps that you need to bring accountability in your life.

You say, “Well, Pastor, I’m accountable to the Lord in God’s grace.” Great, but it’s fine to be accountable to other people. The Bible tells us to confess our sins to one another. The Bible says, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend.”

I’ve got three guys that have helped me through all of my issues of life. We have been holding each other accountable and praying for each other for 34 years. I need that band of brothers and so do you need them.

Men and women need to get some other men and women in their life. Men, get some men in your life. Women, get some women in your life that are mature and spiritual and can hold you accountable while they pray for you.

HOW TO BREAK THE CHAINS OF PORNOGRAPHY

And then what do you do? You create something bigger in your life. Ultimately, pornography is idolatry. It is saying to God, “You’re not enough.” It is making a god of sexual gratification and stimulation. You’re willing to put this ahead of God, before God, and eradicate God: idolatry.

You are willing to even destroy other people’s lives — and you do. You’re willing to destroy the blessing of sexual courtship, intimacy and romance within the context of marriage. You’ve got to say no to that. “This is idolatry.”

That means get a big God in your life. Know who God is. Know what Jesus has done in your life. Then, get big relationships in your life. The enemy of pornography is meaningful relationships. I asked God to not only give me a nausea for pornography, but I ask God to give me a love for my wife that was so filling there was no room anywhere else in my life. And, when you falter — notice what I said “when you falter” because, to some degree, you’re going to falter — then immediately, right then, go to that accountability person, go to the Lord in prayer, ask God to forgive you.

BUILDING UP A FULFILLING RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD AND SPOUSE

Rebuild the fences in your life, rebuild the stepping stones in your life and get your heart and your mind back fixed on Jesus because that’s the issue. The issue was idolatry — for that moment, you decided that idol was going to bring meaning to your life and you found out it didn’t, here comes the shame and the guilt but now we’re back to Jesus and forgiveness.

Now we’re back to the Spirit of God, fill me. Back to the Word of God, fill me. Back to meaningful relationships, fill me. And then, if you’re married, begin to develop the blessings to true sexuality.

That is a glorious, regular, giving — not taking, giving — relationship between a man and a woman in a marriage bed that is honorable as you enter into sexuality, not to take, but to give and that the body of the husband belongs to his wife and the body of the wife belongs to her husband and you do not defraud one another except for spiritual times of prayer and fasting.

When the blessing of intimacy occurs, there is no turning away of the face and you’re able to look at one another in the eyes because God gave you a heart that gave your body to that person instead of taking the body of that person for yourself.

And, if you’re not yet married, you begin to prepare yourself, “God, prepare me to be someone who understands the right role of Biblical sexuality within marriage and not to allow idolatry of sexuality. Sexual gratification outside of marriage brings destruction and brings despair and nothing gratifying.

Idolatry never works, but what does work is the love of God and the love of God that is filling to overflowing. And, in the overflowing, it matures you so that you’re ready for a true intimacy within the boundaries of a marriage and the covenantal blessings of sexuality.

(Resource for help overcoming pornography: Harvest Ministries.)

Dr. Harry L. Reeder III is the Senior Pastor of Briarwood Presbyterian Church in Birmingham.

This podcast was transcribed by Jessica Havin, editorial assistant for Yellowhammer News. Jessica has transcribed some of the top podcasts in the country and her work has been featured in a New York Times Bestseller.

(Image: File)

3 hours ago

Alabama Power customers start seeing federal tax reform benefits this month

Alabama Power customers are beginning to benefit this month from a decision made by the Alabama Public Service Commission related to federal tax reforms.

Starting with July bills, the typical monthly bill for a residential customer is being reduced by more than $9 each month for the remainder of the year. The savings will be reflected in the “Total Due” section on monthly bills for the remainder of the year.

“We are pleased to begin providing these savings to our customers,” said Richard Hutto, vice president of Regulatory Affairs for Alabama Power.

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The federal tax reform legislation, approved late last year, lowered corporate income tax rates, which reduces taxes for Alabama Power. Taxes levied on the company are passed on, so a lower tax rate directly benefits Alabama Power’s 1.4 million customers.

This is the first portion of $337 million in savings coming to all Alabama Power customers through 2019.

(Courtesy of Alabama NewsCenter)

5 hours ago

Rep. Martha Roby: Pro-growth policies are working in AL-02 communities

Over the last year and a half, Republicans in Congress and the Trump Administration have worked tirelessly to unleash our economy and foster growth right here in the United States. Since November of 2016, 3.7 million jobs have been created, and one million of those came after the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act became law. Unemployment numbers are at the lowest point they’ve been in decades. Job openings are at a record high – 213,000 jobs were added in June alone. Also last month, there were 6.7 million job openings, which marks the first time since the year 2000 that the number of job openings is larger than the number of people unemployed.

As you may know, the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act roughly doubled the standard deduction while lowering tax rates. Because of this historic tax reform, 90 percent of Americans have seen bigger paychecks this year. Plus, more than four million Americans have seen increased wages, bonuses, and expanded retirement options.

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Thanks to tax reform and our efforts to spur economic growth, Americans are working and businesses are growing – and Alabama’s Second District hasn’t missed out on the momentum. Since the enactment of our tax overhaul last year, several businesses have announced they are opening branches in our district, expanding existing ones, offering pay increases to employees, and more. I would like to take this opportunity to briefly share some of the great economic news we’ve received so far.

Most recently, Alabama manufacturer Sabel Steel, which has locations in Montgomery and Dothan, announced they will provide pay increases to all employees, invest in new equipment, expand existing facilities, and hire additional workers thanks to tax reform. I believe the company’s CEO Keith Sabel said it best himself: “There’s optimism. With the previous administration, we were hammered by rule changes and regulations. It was like trying to drink water out of a firehose. The change in policy under President Trump was enormous, and the attitude among businessmen and especially other steel manufacturers has been incredibly optimistic. Tax reform and other policies psychologically have made an enormous difference.”

James Hardie Building Products announced plans to open a new manufacturing plant in Prattville. This project is the largest industrial development in Autauga County in 50 years, and it will have a significant economic impact on the area.

U.S. firearms maker Kimber Gun Manufacturing also announced a project in AL-02. By early 2019, the company will open a $38 million production facility in Troy that will create more than 350 high-paying jobs over the next five years.

Also in Troy, Rex Lumber Co. will soon open a state of the art sawmill operation that will employ more than 100 people. This $110 million investment will create quality employment opportunities and a significant new timber market in Pike County.

In Coffee County, Wayne Farms has announced a $105 million expansion at their Enterprise fresh processing facility. This investment will bring a strong economic boost to the area.

Last, but certainly not least, Great Southern Wood Preserving based in Abbeville recently announced it will use savings from the tax overhaul to invest in additional employee benefits, including lower health care costs, more paid time off, and a new scholarship program. In addition, the company has given pay increases to employees across the board.

So you see, thanks to our pro-growth policies and a commitment to fostering economic growth in this country, Americans are confident in our economy – and rightfully so. Hardworking people in our very own communities have already benefited tremendously as a result of these important efforts, and I am eager to see this positive forward momentum continue for all Alabamians.

U.S. Rep. Martha Roby is a Republican from Montgomery.

Listen to the craziest case Jonathan Cooner has ever worked…. WOW

Alexander Shunnarah “Shark of The Week”, Jonathan Cooner came to the studio with some great stories. Jonathan started it off by talking about his time with the law firm and the number of phone calls they get and how he started off. Jonathan told the guys a story about “A toddler and a mechanical bull.”  Jonathan went into depth about what it means to be a member of the Shunnarah Law Firm and even gave his wife and daughter a shoutout.

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Subscribe to the Yellowhammer Radio Presents The Ford Faction podcast on iTunes or Stitcher.

6 hours ago

Coal company executive, Alabama attorney convicted of bribery

A prominent Alabama attorney and a coal company executive have been convicted on federal charges involving bribery of a state lawmaker.

The verdict against Joel Gilbert, a partner with Balch & Bingham law firm, and Drummond Company Vice President David Roberson was announced Friday after a four-week trial. Jurors found them guilty of conspiracy, bribery, three counts of honest services wire fraud and money laundering.

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Prosecutors said the two men bribed former state Rep. Oliver Robinson to oppose the Environmental Protection Agency’s expansion of a Superfund site, and also to oppose prioritizing the site’s expensive cleanup. Robinson pleaded guilty last year to bribery and tax evasion. He has not yet been sentenced.

A third defendant, Balch attorney Steven McKinney, was dismissed from the case one day before closing arguments began.

(Associated Press, copyright 2018)

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7 hours ago

Yes, we DO get along!

I don’t remember the airline or where the flight was headed. But I will never forget the woman seated next to me.

During the course of our brief conversation, I mentioned that my family lives in Orange Beach, Alabama. Her eyebrows furrowed as she received that fairly innocuous information. Without hesitation, however, she said, “I wouldn’t live there in a million years.”

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I was taken aback, but smiled gamely, and asked, “Really? Why’s that?”

“I just couldn’t take the rain,” the woman told me.

I was silent for a beat or two, looking into the woman’s eyes, mentally scrambling to figure out what I had missed. She also continued to look at me, waiting I suppose, for a response. When none tumbled from my lips, she leaned in my direction somewhat aggressively and as if she were talking to an idiot, being forced to explain something obvious and simple, said, “The Rain. Your rain. It rains all the time in Orange Beach. I could never live in a place like that.”

I nodded as if I understood and asked how many times she had been to Orange Beach.

“Twice,” she told me. “Once for three days and another time for a whole week. We never saw the sunshine. It rains constantly in Orange Beach.”

I’ve thought about that woman off and on for years. It was such a ridiculous exchange that I’ve never really decided if it was funny or just stupid.

Obviously, it rained the only two times she ever visited. Now, I don’t study weather patterns, I don’t know Jim Cantore, and I haven’t stayed at a Holiday Inn Express in a long time, but I’m fairly certain that it rains every day somewhere! In a lot of places, I’ll bet it even rains for a week at a time! And who, over the age of six or seven, has not seen it rain during a vacation?

Yeah, I’m sorry, but for a person to single out a week and a half and believe they can accurately extrapolate the cloud and moisture conditions that visitors to Orange Beach can expect for the rest of forever…is nuts. It’s beyond nuts.

Except that you and I virtually do the same thing almost every day.

We allow the media to dictate what we believe is “happening everywhere.” In print, online, and on television, we allow our fears to be stoked and our thoughts to be directed. By consuming “overlarge” portions of what they are serving, we encourage the news media’s overwhelming coverage of All Things Horrible.

Understand, I am not blaming the media for what they do or how they do it. I’m not even suggesting they do anything differently. Would it have any effect if I did? (The correct answer is “no”.)

Neither am I suggesting that racial anger, regional bias, political selfishness, or deranged behavior do not exist. But if you and I begin our day with the news and check in on the news several times during the day, then end our day with the news, it doesn’t take long for us to become convinced that what we see in the news is an accurate portrayal of society. And it’s
not.

Consider the fact that there are 19,519 towns and cities in America today. There are another 16,360 unincorporated townships. We have a population of 326 million people. All those people have access to multiple channels and online entities. They are available to us 24-hours a day. And they use those twenty-four hours every single day to keep us “informed” about exactly what is happening—not just in America, but in the whole world…

So here’s a question: If things are as bad as many of us have begun to believe, what are all those news outlets leaving out?

Shouldn’t there be at least enough bad stuff to fill twenty-four hours without repeating the same things again and again?

But as far as I can tell, when something crazy happens, not only does every channel “break” the same news, they “report” it over and over for days on end.

Look, we do care about what’s happening nationally. You and I care about race relations and politics and schools and statues and prison reform and the Boy Scouts and killer lettuce and whatever the heck that goofy looking psycho in North Korea will do next…

But I have to believe that you and I would rather put more time and constructive thought into our own families and communities. Yet, even those subjects—when they are mentioned at all—are delivered by most of our national media drenched with the overarching message: People who are different from each other in visible ways do not get along.

My point is a simple one. I’m convinced that we get along better than some folks would have us think. I’ve been watching this whole thing for quite a while now. I travel extensively and am through airports, in hotels, visiting cities, their suburbs, and exploring small towns.

I don’t always fly. I drive—sometimes long distances—and stop often to talk with the people I meet. I’ve spoken to and talked with the students on more than 400 college campuses, eaten at great restaurants, not so great restaurants, and locally favorite restaurants in every corner of this nation.

I have spoken to audiences in all fifty states and each of our nation’s territories. I have spoken to convention halls filled with men and arenas with thousands of women. I have spent time with the men and women who serve on military installations around the world.

I have watched people pull together during times of enormous stress. I have witnessed families with nothing to spare, give generously to families with nothing at all.

And after all that, I must say that I’m not sure why the media appears so determined to convince us that we do not get along…(the only possible answer is “ratings”) but assuming their efforts will not stop, we need to recognize the effect it has on us and at least stop bathing in the information.

We understand what drives television ratings. We know what sells newspapers. I wonder however, if we understand the strategy the media employs in order to attract enough viewers to stay on the air?

There is one major rule governing that strategy and it is this: If there is no large and wide-spread amount of anger and outrage to show the public, we will seek out the largest that can be found at the moment. Even if the only anger and outrage we find is a small and contained amount, with proper camera angles and specific wording by the reporter, it can be presented as an example of “what is happening everywhere.”

Except that it’s not.

What is happening almost everywhere? Folks are being polite. They are being considerate.

Yes, especially in the south.

I was checking out of the Bay Minette, Alabama Wal-Mart last week. As the cashier scanned my items, a forty-ish-year-old guy in a ball cap leaned around me, apologized for the interruption and spoke to the cashier. The following, word for word, is exactly what each of them said to the other.

Man: Excuse me, ma’am. When you get a chance, I need some help in the Photo department.

Cashier: Sure. (She turns to speak to a manager several lines away…) Miss Dana! Miss Dana, there’s a gentleman who needs help in Photos.

Man: (walking away) Thank you, ma’am.

Cashier: You’re welcome, sir.

I have to say, I smiled. I was proud of us. Yeah, us. You know…America. The South. Alabama. Baldwin County. Bay
Minette. Us!

Oh sure, I was proud of the cashier and the man. But they are us. It is, after all, how most of us act. Especially in Orange Beach. Even when it rains.

One more thing about the cashier and the man in the ball cap….Seeing them act with such respect towards each other really made my day. It crossed my mind to hug them. But I didn’t. I didn’t even know their names…

So I just took their picture. For US!

Let’s all do our part this week and continue to “Get Along.”

Perform an act of kindness or “Notice” a good gesture—then let me know about it in the Comments section of my website or on Facebook or Instagram.

I would love to continue to hear about how we are continuing to get along.

Andy Andrews is hailed by New York Times reporter as “someone who has quietly become one of the most influential people in America,” Andy Andrews is the author of multiple international bestsellers including The Traveler’s Gift and The Noticer. He is also an in-demand speaker, coach, and consultant for the world’s largest organizations.