The New Year's resolution that changed my life in 2014, and how you can stick to yours

As we approach the turn of another year, research says that about half of us are gearing up for a New Year’s resolution. And many of us are planning to make the same resolution we’ve tried — and failed — to implement multiple years before.

Psychologist Peter Herman calls this “false hope syndrome.”

“New Year’s resolvers typically report making the same pledge for five years or more before they manage a six-month success,” he wrote in one of his studies, “and of those who fail this year, 60 percent will make the same resolution again next year.”

That’s a pretty bleak outlook for those of us approaching the new year with unbridled optimism.

But the good news is, this year actually can be different. There’s a relatively simple way to make your New Year’s resolution stick. I’ll briefly sum up the research, then I’ll illustrate how it worked for me in 2014.

First off, willpower alone is not going to be enough.

John Norcross, a psychologist and author of the book Changeology: 5 Steps to Realizing Your Goals and Resolutions, says that 70 percent of people believe willpower is the most important part of maintaining a resolution. It’s important, of course, but he goes on to note that “anyone who relies exclusively on willpower will fail at twice the rate of someone else… The people who simply devised a resolution and were motivated but didn’t devise a plan have a 4% chance” of sticking to it.

You’re going to need to take the time to map out a plan. Dreams become goals when a plan is developed to reach them.

Second, be realistic.

“Creating too high of a goal leads to dissolution and doubt,” Norcross writes. “Break resolutions into far more manageable pieces.” No one goes from the couch to the finish line of a marathon in a day. Set ambitious goals, but work toward them incrementally. Research suggests it takes about three months to turn a temporary action into a habitual behavior. But how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.

(There are some additional suggestions based on the research mentioned above in this recent Fast Company article. It’s worth a read.)

So with those things in mind — which I stumbled into before later finding research to back them up — I went into 2014 with this rather ambiguous resolution: I resolved to relentlessly pursue self-improvement mentally, physically and spiritually.

Here’s how it played out.

Mentally:

I’ve been a steady, but not fervent reader over the years. I initially decided I’d commit to reading six books in 2014 (incremental!) that were challenging and would improve my knowledge in areas that could be practically beneficial, but were also enjoyable.

For example, Gordon S. Wood’s 800-page Empire of Liberty: A History of the Early Republic, 1789-1815 was one of the selections. But no matter how fascinated I was by the content — and Empire of Liberty is truly a remarkable book — 800 pages is a slog. I can barely sit still long enough to go to sleep at night, much less to spend the 30-plus hours it would take to read a book that long. Fortunately, technology saved my New Year’s resolution.

I started listening to audiobooks and added podcasts to my plan as well. Pretty soon, the whole six books idea was tossed aside because I formed habits that became a natural part of my routine. I was cranking through several books a month and consuming vast amounts of information through podcasts, often while simultaneously doing something else. In the shower? I’ve got an audiobook or podcast going. Driving by myself in the car? Audiobook or podcast. Cleaning? Audiobook or podcast. Going to sleep? Audiobook or podcast with the sleep timer on.

And the real game-changer — I actually found that listening to books and podcasts while exercising was better than listening to music. I now run several miles a day on weekends (more about physical improvement in a minute), all while keeping my mind occupied on what I’m listening to, rather than the fact that my chest is burning and my legs want a rest.

Some recommendations:
Books —
Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy,
Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap…And Others Don’t,
Follow Me: A Call to Die. A Call to Live,
Benjamin Franklin: An American Life,
Thomas Jefferson: The Art of Power,
How Do You Kill 11 Million People?: Why the Truth Matters More Than You Think,
Start with Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action
Podcasts —
The Thomas Jefferson Hour,
Love + Radio,
Thinking in Public,
Radiolab,
The BS Report,
Radical Together,
Serial.

Physically:

After playing basketball in college, the last seven or eight years have been a cycle of going from doing very little, to lifting weights constantly, to playing pickup basketball occasionally, to trying to convince myself to go to the gym and get on a treadmill, to some mix of all of that. The audiobooks and podcasts were helping me kill two birds with one stone while jogging (mental and physical), but that wasn’t going to be enough.

I’d resisted all of the home workout crazes, mainly because I’d never actually met anyone who’d gotten results. I’m sure they’re out there somewhere, but I’ve never met them.

With my 2014 resolution, I knew I needed a better plan. I’d started hearing a lot about Iron Tribe, a gym founded in Birmingham that now has locations across the state and other parts of the country, and personally knew multiple people who’d experienced pretty remarkable results.

I decided to give it a shot by signing up for “Iron Tribe 101,” a 30-day class that let’s new members see what it’s all about. I was hooked immediately and went from having to peel myself off of the couch to actually looking forward to going to the gym.

And one of the best parts is that they map out all of the workouts (a plan!).

I can’t recommend it highly enough, and that goes for people of all fitness levels. It’s not abnormal at all to be working out in a class with college athletes right next to grandparents.

Spiritually:

I knew from the beginning that this would be the most challenging aspect of my resolution and the one that would take me the farthest outside of my comfort zone. I decided to take it head on by volunteering to lead our church small group, an incredible group of about 15 couples in their 20s to early 30s that meets once a week on Tuesday evenings.

I’d been able to watch a mentor of mine lead the group the year prior, so I had some direction. But I’ve found the saying, “the best way to learn is to teach” to be absolutely true. Knowing that I’ve got to be prepared to lead on Tuesday nights is just the right amount of pressure to make sure I stay up on my Bible readings and lesson preparation. That’s another smart play when it comes to making New Year’s resolutions — put yourself in a position to be held accountable. Peer pressure might have worked against you in high school, but it can work in your favor now.

There are a lot of great Bible reading plans out there that can keep you on point. What worked for me was downloading the YouVersion Bible app. Not only does it have just about every available translation and plenty of reading plans, it’ll also read out loud to you.

Conclusion:

I’ve got a long, long way to go in each of the areas mentioned above. But the reason why I consider my 2014 resolution to be a resounding success is because the changes I wanted to make are now habits, part of my daily routine, hopfeully meaning I’ll continue to improve in those areas this coming year, even as I move on to a new challenge.

Happy New Year, y’all! Now get to planning…