7 leadership lessons I learned from losing to Auburn

Recently, I experienced the single most exciting sporting event of my 32 years.  I was at the Alabama vs. Auburn game & it was epic.  Auburn beat Alabama in a crazy last play with one second left on the clock.  I have never experienced as much disappointment as a fan.  I left the stadium shocked & I hated the outcome of the game.

You must know, I am a die hard Alabama fan.  Some people like to hunt & fish.  I have other friends that enjoy working in the yard.  My hobby is Alabama football.  It’s what I do to disconnect from starting companies & doing business.

I have no idea why I care so much about people that I don’t know personally, but I just do.  About 350 days a year I am texting with my friends, Chad & Louie, about Alabama football.  We talk recruiting, game plans, & what Bama players are saying on twitter.  We truly love Bama football to our core & being in the stadium for the biggest loss in my 32 years as a fan will be a lifelong memory.

Now that I have had time to process it all, here are the 7 lessons I learned from losing to Auburn.

1. You win as a team, you lose as team

When Alabama was flying high, the fan base talked about Alabama.  When we got beat, they started talking about specific players.  Great leaders never blame specific players, they create a culture that wins together & loses together.  The Alabama football team has showed me more about being a TEAM through this loss than all the wins.

After stupid fans made death threats on Cade Foster’s life on twitter, Bama players were quick to back up Cade.  I’m proud of this team for doing this & not throwing any team member under the bus in the media.

2. Admit your failure

If you fail at a result you are aiming for, admit it.  I’m listening to so many Bama fans that are justifying the loss versus just saying, “Auburn was the better team.”  Great leaders admit a failure openly & honestly.

The first step in learning from a mistake is to own the mistake. 

3. Don’t react after the loss

As we were walking out of the stadium, we had over 15 different Auburn fans get in our face & shake pom poms, scream something stupid or sarcastic at us. I personally wanted to punch every one of them in the nose.  I really did.  Yeah, that’s probably ridiculous, but they were throwing salt in the wound.  I DO NOT blame them for celebrating & saying dumb things, that is life & they were just excited!  The lesson I learned is to not react after a loss because nothing good can come of it.

When you get beat, don’t react.  Just keep walking.  Don’t say anything.  Don’t tweet anything.  Don’t Facebook anything.  Just shut up & go to bed.  NOTHING good comes from reacting.  I used to be the world’s worst at this & hopefully I’ve gotten better at it.

Good leaders are humble enough to say, “That was a great team & they beat us.”  If another company wins the bid, don’t gripe, praise them.  If another person gets the job, don’t talk behind their back, praise them.  Praise the winner because it’s good for your heart.  You may absolutely despise the opponent, but a true winner will never publicly talk bad about another team.

5.  Blow off steam privately

This may sound opposite of #4, but it’s important.  I truly wanted to beat Auburn, so I just yelled in the car for a little bit about how much I wanted to win & why I dislike Auburn.  Here is the deal: I just needed to blow off some steam, get through the emotion & then feel better.  If you have suffered a loss, IT IS OKAY to blow off some steam to a close friend.  After you blow off some steam you will feel better & nobody will get hurt in the process.

Just remember to do this privately & not online! 

6. Get a good night’s sleep

When I woke up this morning, I felt better & it didn’t seem like a big deal.  In life, a good night of sleep will allow you to gain perspective on situations & a fresh brain is better for decision making & moving forward.

Most things aren’t as big of a deal as they seem. 

7.  Find the positives 

Yes, we got beat.  Yes, that sucked.  However, I got to see some friends I haven’t seen in 10 years.  I ate some of the best tailgating food I’ve ever eaten in my life.  I talked with one of best friends for hours in the car about life, family, friends, God, church, & business.  I experienced the best football game in my 32 years.  I had enough money to actually buy the tickets to go.  I have a car that took me to & from the game.  I experienced the sounds and smells of college football on a Saturday on a college campus.  The weather was SO perfect.  I witnessed an amazing sunset in the stadium in the 3rd quarter.  I could keep going…

Every situation has positives & it’s your choice on what you focus on!  Choose to see the good in everything & everybody.

Casey Graham is the Chief Entrepreneur Officer at The Rocket Company. For more articles like this, visit his business and leadership blog can be found at CaseyGraham.com.