5 things Alabama's 624 ObamaCare enrollees could do together for fun

Congratulations, Alabama's 624 ObamaCare enrollees — Congratulations, Alabama’s 624 ObamaCare enrollees

Only 624 Alabamians signed up for ObamaCare through the federal exchange during its first month in operation. The minuscule number of Americans who signed up nationally (106,000) could almost all fit inside Bryant-Denny stadium… More on that in a minute.

Before we get to that, here are some more numbers to consider.

According to the Associated Press, “About 90,000 Alabamians will have to find new health insurance policies because their current policies don’t meet the requirements of the federal health care law.” That means that for every one person who has signed up for ObamaCare in Alabama, 144 people are losing their current policy.

There are 460 incorporated cities and towns in Alabama. That means that an average of only 1.35 people per town in Alabama have signed up.

There are 50,645.33 square miles in Alabama. That means that only one Alabamian in every 81 square miles has signed up.

But there is a significant upside to so few Alabamians having signed up for ObamaCare that no one seems to have considered yet — there are a lot of fun things that a group of 624 can do together as a group in our beautiful state!

Here are some examples:

1. They could go on a trip together with a semi-pro baseball team

A Boeing 747-400 holds 660 passengers in its high density one-class configuration. So we could pack every single Alabama ObamaCare enrollee onto one plane and still have enough seats left over for the entire Birmingham Barons team to come along for the ride.

2. Try out different sections of Bryant-Denny stadium every game for the next quarter century

Ok, follow me here… Bryant-Denny stadium holds 101,821 people. That means our bloc of 624 ObamaCare enrollees could sit together in a different section of the stadium every single home game for the next 27 years without sitting in the same section twice.

(For the mathematically challenged: 101,821 capacity divided by our bloc of 624 enrollees, divided by an average of 6 home games per year. Roll Tide.)

Oh, and if the ObamaCare enrollees are Auburn fans, they could do the exact same thing for the next 23 years at Jordan-Hare Stadium (Capacity 87,451).

3. Grab three friends and take in a concert at the historic Alabama Theater

The Alabama Theatre in Birmingham has a seating capacity of 2,500 people. That means Alabama’s 624 ObamaCare enrollees could each grab three friends (Do ObamaCare enrollees have friends?), all head down to the theater for a show together and the building would still be 128 people short of a full house. Rock on.

4. Take their own exotic animal home with them from the Birmingham Zoo

The Birmingham Zoo, which Mrs. Yellowhammer and I enjoyed for the first time a couple of weeks ago, has over 750 animals on the grounds. That, of course, means that every single Alabamian who has successfully signed up for ObamaCare through Healthcare.gov could not only attend the zoo, but could also take one of the animals home with them and still leave 126 animals behind for other people to enjoy.

5. Eat together at The Davidson Center

After all the fun the ObamaCare enrollees have had, they’re probably going to be hungry. Fortunately, the 800-capacity buffet setup in the U.S. Space & Rocket Center’s Davidson Center building would leave more than enough room for all of the Alabama ObamaCare enrollees to sit together and enjoy a good meal before returning home to worry about entrusting their health and well-being to the U.S. federal government.